Friday, May 28, 2010

Soccergate

Sometimes people ask me why I dress up. At times, it does seem a bit superficial and unnecessary. But here is an example of why it is important to know how to, as our friend Jesse Thorn likes to say, dress like a grown-up. (Thanks to Put This On for breaking this story, which I will be referring to as Soccergate)

First, the English National Soccer Team was featured in this fashion spread.


They look pretty good, with the exception of their fat, shiny ties. Not true English gentlemen, but still looking sharp.

Not to be outdone, the Japanese National Soccer Team was featured in a different fashion spread.


Great fit on the suits and nice dimples on the ties. More importantly, they look comfortable in their suits.

With these two pictures in mind, I run across this photograph of the United States National Soccer Team, igniting the firestorm of Soccergate.


You see those three guys at the bottom? I'm pretty sure they are two presidents and a vice-president. Now call me old-fashioned, but I think heads of state should be shown a basal level of respect.

Why are they all wearing warm-up jackets? Did no one tell them they were going to meet with the president? Were they just stopping for ice-cream in Washington, D.C. and wanted to say hello to Barry, Bill, and Joe before they left?

The most hilarious thing is how ALL of them have pants that are much too long for them. They are bunching terribly at their calves and make them all look like a class of middle-schoolers wearing their dad's dress-up clothes. It's a good thing I don't care about soccer (or what the rest of the world calls "Futsbal"), or I would be thoroughly embarrassed.

In any case, the lesson here is this: you don't have to care about style or dressing-up, but you still need to know how to do it. If you have the immense privilege of meeting with the President, you will have the foresight to look professional and not like the checkout clerk at Dick's Sporting Goods.

5 comments:

  1. Nice post, but I don't think you were quite judgmental or snooty enough. :p

    (Although I do give you a hearty "Hear, hear" when it comes to guys knowing how to dress like grownups. I absolutely agree that it's a lost art in America!)

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  2. Usually I wouldn't care this much, but they were meeting with the President. It was a bit embarrassing for all of us as a country.

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  3. You never really answered the question though:
    Why is it that you dress up?
    I mean, what made you make that decision in life?

    and I agree about the soccer uniforms. Suit's are cooler.

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  4. I guess I never really went out of my way to explicitly state it, but I dress up because it makes me feel more professional, comfortable, and confident. Of course, it is more complicated than that, but I will describe it in more detail in a future post.

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  5. Nothing says "professional" like "Goodwill"!

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