Sunday, September 11, 2011

Bloggin' Your Way to a Thinner You!

Last Friday, I had the amazing opportunity to give a guest lecture on blogging to a "Writing in the Technological Age" course at the University of Illinois-Chicago*. After the laser-show and the stunning introduction by my hype man, I entered the classroom and pummeled them with wisdom. Here is a small** excerpt.


"Are you frustrated with your lives? Can't seem to find what you are looking for? You're right! There is something wrong with you. And I am the only person who can help you help yourself. With blogging.

With my patented 44-step blogging system, I can teach you how to blog yourself into real blogging shape. Here's my first tip: go on a blogging diet. Eat only foods featured on your blog.

Pictured above: It's got a TOMATO. It's HEALTHY.

But don't blogging stop there! Inspire others with your blogdom and blogography.

Pictured above: You know what this flight of pancakes makes me want to eat? A healthy fruit snack.

Once you've blogged into the blogosphere, you can blog your blog into full blogness by blogging about other blogs. For example, you could blog about how amazing my blog, The Sartorial Skeptic, is. Be sure to include many, many links. And hyperlinks.

I've really enjoyed my time live-blogging with you (that's what I call talking), and feel free to blog about this blog-lecture. Just be sure to blog about my blog! Blog ME? No, blog YOU. Happy blogging!"


  1. Tomatoes make every situation healthy and happy.

  2. Your blog-lecture was fantastic. I especially appreciated your thoughts on blog-censorship (only in the direst circumstances). Thanks again for sharing your dark wit and erudition, and hope to see you back on campus for Part II!